The Three Roles People Play In The Drama Triangle

If you feel any negative thoughts or emotions, if you’re feeling bad in your couple or if you’re

feeling bad in your family, if you have a bad perspective. Feeling negativity at all, feeling fear, resentment, hurt, frustration. You don’t feel you’re free to be who you are. You don’t feel free to speak what your truth is. If you’re feeling angry all the time, you’re in drama. What happens is and this is not the way it is supposed to be set up, most humans have learned a way of relating with one another that is in three roles. There are three points to this drama triangle. There are three different ways you can be set up. As a child, you were given this role. You are going to play the glue, the rescuer. I am going to play the victim. You are going to play the persecutor.

There are these three roles. This is from the Karpman Drama Triangle from the ‘60s. The one role is the rescuer, “Let me help you. Can I do everything for you? I don’t want you to be upset, so let me do everything. Let me make sure that I’ve got things figured out ten steps ahead of you without asking. Let me try to anticipate whatever needs you’re going to have so that you don’t get upset. Let me walk on eggshells. Let me make sure that everything is fine and everything is to your liking. Let me try to control the universe around you so that you’re okay.” That’s playing a rescuer and it’s exhausting for both sides but to a victim, you can never do enough. You can never show up enough. You can never rearrange the world and control the world enough because the victim, “The poor me nothing ever goes right. That’s not enough. I’m angry because nothing ever goes right.”

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